Image and self-image
Recently, I had some facial re-construction. No, not a facelift, but removal of some squamous cells from my nose. I overheard someone ask my husband if it bothered me having a disfiguration on my face. I laughed, and said by the time you get to my age you get over the visible signs of aging and learn to love the roadmap of your life shown front and centre. Anyway, I'd rather have a speed bump and a crater on my nose than some cancerous cells playing havoc under my skin.
How we see ourselves, our self-image, is formed from a complex collection of events starting when we are very young. We all know the basics – how much our parents loved us and showed their love; sibling love; friends, neighbours. But by the time we get to high school, when hormones are raging, causing us angst and doubt, it only takes one person to say the wrong thing, or even look at you sideways, and all the positive reinforcement in the world will not protect you from yourself.
Fortunately for most of us, this stage does not last long, and as we get older, we look back with astonishment when we find our peers felt the same way. Even the cool, good-looking ones.
When you see a photo that doesn't show you in your best light, how do you react to it? What if other people say it's a great photo? How others see you is much broader than how you see yourself. What do you see when you look at your partner, mother, best friend? Do you see the crooked nose, the grey hair, the childhood scar? Or do you just see them, the whole person? Remember that the image you see in the mirror is only a tiny part of your whole being; the photos that you love, or hate, are also only a part of you. What we do with our lives and how we respond to the events of our lives has far more impact on how others see us.
I love getting older. The sagging flesh, wrinkles and blemishes matter far less than those pimples of youth. The insecurities of youthful self-image melt away. Love the skin you live in.
The image is called ‘Nana Jenni doing ballet’ by Emily, July 2008. I could not be prouder of that image!
